eyy.

iam seriously going crazy over that yellow tshirt guy.

can you imagine i rather take the later bus just so i can go along with him.

and i achieve what i want today.

okay let me begin..

i wake up ard 6.25am.

then i was like damn sure i am NOT going to be taking the same bus as the CACATs.

so i was like taking my time.

this time syafiq was quick to remind me that he's gonna be there,outside the MRT station.expecting me to see him this time. after like so long,it was on wednesday that he messages me that he saw me.

waddduuhhhh.

guys are guys anyway.so what if you saw me? iam like 'okay!'.cause it doesnt really matter to me right now.

then i called yq ,see whether he's gone to school ready NOT.hah. okay then.all the way to the 72 bus stand,i kept thinking of that yellow shirt guy.walaoweeiiii.

all i know about him is that he's in track and feild and that sab is helping me out.wee~

happy somehow.then i was like looking around.no sign of anyone i know.like fathin or chanel or kyle then then i saw him. hah. high up in a way.(: then i saw him scanning the queue then he glance thru me then he stay calm. and you know what!!.he wears green too seyy.and so did i!

a super light green.i like larh.how? this is a terrible crush you know.iam like addicted.i want him to smile like before.the way i saw he did.then i saw him cuming up the swirl stairs of the bus then i was like 'breathe in and out.relax nurul.relax.'arghs. iloveit.the feeling that iam being watched by someone i adore.then he sits at the seat behind me.hothothot.then as the bus proceeds moving i lean to the glass cause feeling tired and drained. having a test soon,very soon.during the first period of the day. arghs.but he made my day. next hor.

his hand suddenly appear at the gap between my seat and the window ledge.dadupdadup*.

but the dissapointing part is that this time he never alight at the same bustop as i did.so preety missed the chance to see him up front.but its okay cause iam super sure that everyday from today onwards iam like gonna take that same exact bus to school.so what i dont go with my clique.as long as i got to see my yellow shirt guy iam happy ready.yeah.he stays at tampines seyy.

i may not know him in details or any further but i am so attracted to his appearance.the look of sooo... i cant explain larh. its all inside me.

okay larh till here only.

i soo cant wait for this coming tuesday.

the time i may see him again(:

its the start of the week finally. but mondays are always a drag. arghs.. went to meet them this morning as usual , lucky for me i wasn't the last one this time. so don't need to pay the fine. save. save. hah. i wore the grey longsleeve,halfie bought for me on valentine's day for the first time cause i kinda missed him. (: okay. lets get back on track. i went to school as per normal. saw jeremy entering from the first bustop gate. lost her mind over finding sim and stuff. tap my card for attendance, settled down. later happily realised that i didn't brought the tutorial booklet for the lecture. walao. waste of time xia. might as well don't go for lecture. then i blady waste the time i had, listening to songs and doing other things but never digital electronic's stuff. waddduuhh. i kinda lost ready xia. don't even understand what the leecturer talking abt xia. then kyle darling keep making fun of the front bald haired lecturer. haha. very bad xia. the lecturer very good towards us sey. okay! next after lecture we went to the south canteen to have lunch. forced myself to eat at the malay stall. with the evil makcik. then gt myself, honeydew ice blend with pearl. saw jeremy again. chanel went insane after getting to see sim after like one week from the last time. walao. please. iam no longer interesteed in jeremy leyy.i wnat to concentrate on other things in life. rather then blabbering and going mad over someone, so ordinary like jeremy . but he reminds me of adam. sepet eyes. arghs. iam over him larh okay?. it was just a juvenile infatuation. a minor crush i had when i first saw him during the three day orientation leyy. haha. lets move on. i went to the library to meet up with the rests of my classmates . time passes very fast though. later i gt sick of the ISO. so i went to wait for darren, sean, yq, eugene and freeman. a runaway tactic. (: haha. i let ISO go first.
then we went to cheers cause darren want buy chocolate. once there the cashier queue super duper long xia. then when i was in the process to take my bottled drink in the refrigerator,i saw my yellow tshirt guy who turns white then today he wore black.
omg. i starts shaking leyy. like neavous leyy. but i saw him looking. so i act as if i never see him then he walk out of the store before me. fuuuyyyooo. i like super high xia after that. but the boring part is that my black color shirt guy dont dare come up and confront me or something. okay. iam lame. i know. who the hell go up to someone they dont know and suddenly create a conversation. only physco's do that soort of stuff. haha.(: okay justnow in the library i sort of bam into lydia's boyfriend and bruder's friends. both give me a look that i should remember them fom somewhere. after much thinking then i remember their identities.(:
okay larh enough about the boys.
after all those tiring happenings i had no choice but to go home with yq ,sabril and chanel.
no kyle and fathin darlings..damn.
i went to get the yellow top frm mango. wee~
happy xia. like cant wait ot use it tomorrow.gaga. then i went to peter lai's night class. was exhausted by then. came in late. sit besides shaz. then horr.
when i was about to fall asleep, mr. lai starts talking abt condom and stuff. walao. if i was him,, i would have been embarrased because out of the twenty students he had today , only four were guys. alamak. dirty xia. okay larh.
then got home. take the bus all the way alone. so drenched.
yawn*
okay larh.
i think till here only.too tired ready leyy.
sweet dreams.

there's alot to be told here.but i wouldn't start today.

up to date,all that i could say now is that i just turn over a new leaf.leaving the past and moving on. without someone i really loved before. HALFIE.

and now all that i could wish for is NOT to have known you at all.cause it hurts me really badly to have to move on after being with you like for two years and 2 months exactly today. depending on you every single second in my life then.i have to suffer now.alone.i am sure i was stupid to let you go just like that.within seconds on the line,i call it off with you. on your special day. your 18th birthday. i am sorry. really i am.but you place me in an unbearable situation. i could not stand you any longer,dear. you blamed me for whatever happened between us. what was left for us is nothing. cause i end our relationship on the day,you left to pursue your dreams.i could not bare the feelings that you're not going to be there for me anymore. having to put up with your nonsense all this while. suddenly i have to adapt to your absence. how could i?!

but what is done,its done. clearly i cant erased the last phone conversation we had from my memory . the moments you said you don't trust me any more. it keeps repeating itself in mind late at night,at first i couldn't believe it. it was depressing for me. that that was the first time you reprimanded me for whatever mistake i did. we're over. you're so far away from me. how am i to just depend on you for my safety like i usually did. you hardly know what happens to me here,while you're there. arghs. my "drinking pals" said its a waste. after we sacrifices so many things just to be together. happily.then it all ends just like that. so fast. without a second thought.

frankly i miss being loved by you,dear. your existance in my life have grown to be an addiction.

ily. this is for you,mister.